Wish to Remain Married? Never Say These 12 Things to Your Husband

Marriage is one of the most challenging things you’ll ever do, trust me.

Every married person knows that! It takes a lot of effort to keep it going, but you know what’s even harder?

Keeping it from falling apart.

When we’re angry, we tend to lash out and say things we don’t mean, and that’s when things can go south.

Even if your man forgives you, he’ll still remember what you said.

So, to keep your marriage strong, here are 11 things you should avoid saying to your husband.

If you’re curious about the nature of your relationship, check out our article about the different types of relationships and how to deal with them.

1. I don’t like your family

Let’s be real, dealing with in-laws can be a real headache, am I right?

We’re not all going to be besties with our husband’s family. But here’s the thing, guys: talking smack about his family is not going to do your marriage any favors.

You know why? Because his family is a part of him!

They were the first people he ever loved, and if you insult them, it could cause him to resent you.

So, if you’re having issues with the in-laws, it’s okay to talk to your man about it. Just make sure you’re not insulting or making sweeping statements.

2. You do everything wrong

Let’s talk about another thing you should never say to your husband if you want to keep your marriage strong.

It’s when you tell him how “badly” he’s doing everything.

Look, I know that marriages can be tough, and there will be times when it feels like he’s not doing anything right.

But saying it out loud can make him feel super inadequate.

Plus, it gives off the impression that you don’t appreciate the things he does well (and let’s be real, he must do some things right, or you wouldn’t have married him in the first place).

The point is…

It’s really easy to let things like this slip out in a moment of anger or after a long day when you’re frustrated and tired, and he somehow manages to burn dinner.

But if you want your marriage to last, it’s important to take a deep breath and avoid using definitive statements like “never” and “always.”

Trust me, it’ll make a world of difference. So, next time you’re feeling frustrated, take a step back and think before you speak.

You may also like:

10 phrases you should never say to your partner (or kiss goodbye to your love paradise)

12 Wise Tips to Fix a Crumbling Marriage That’s Falling Apart

Husband shares 7 tell-tale signs your man likes a coworker (Trust me, I’ve been there, he says)

3. Why do you always do that!?

Let’s talk about another important point to keep in mind when communicating with your husband.

Using words like “never” and “always” can feel like a personal attack and make him defensive. It’s not just frustrating, but it’s also unfair.

Think about it, if your man said, “Why are you ALWAYS so moody?” you’d find it annoying because you know you’re not moody 100% of the time.

So, he feels the same way when you make statements like this.

Instead of attacking him, why not look at the behavior and the root cause?

For example, if he’s often stressed, look at his work-life balance.

If he’s often angry, look at the bigger picture. Is he sleeping enough? Is he burned out? If he’s often lazy, is it because he’s tired, or is he taking you for granted?

You see, behind every behavior is a reason why. So instead of focusing on accusations and definitive statements, get to the root of the issue.

Trust me, it’ll make a world of difference in your communication and relationship.

4. If you just were more like him!

Another major no-no when it comes to talking to your husband.

You ready?

Okay, here it is: never tell your man that you wish he was more like someone else.

Whether you’re comparing him to a family member, an ex, a friend, or even a celebrity on TV, it’s a surefire way to make him feel inadequate.

And let’s be real, don’t we all want to feel accepted and loved by our spouses?

If you make him feel this way, his self-esteem will likely take a hit, and this will have a direct impact on your marriage.

So, my advice is to keep those thoughts to yourself and focus on the good things about your partner.

Sure, the grass may look greener on the other side, but behind closed doors, no one is perfect.

Remember, you chose your husband for a reason, so focus on the positives and appreciate him for who he is.

You may like: Top-Rated Couples Communication Classes Worth Checking

5. I don’t love you

This is a statement that you should never make to your husband.

Saying “I don’t love you” is a big deal, and it’s probably only going to come up during an intense argument or a period of difficulty.

But here’s the thing, if you say it and mean it, then you probably want a divorce.

So, for the purpose of this article, let’s assume it’s said out of anger.

But why is it such a bad thing to throw a statement like this around?

Well, the goal of marriage is to love each other unconditionally.

So, if you tell your husband you don’t love him every time you guys have a disagreement or he says something you don’t like, it’s not going to make him trust you very much.

If you want to stay married, it’s important to measure your words carefully.

Instead of saying “I don’t love you,” try saying something like, “I feel angry and upset right now,” or “I feel disappointed because we’re unable to resolve this fight,” or “I’m starting to resent you because of this situation.”

These are better ways of getting your frustration and anger across without sacrificing the love you both share. Remember, words are powerful, so use them wisely.

6. You remind me of your parents

Okay, this is something that can really hurt your husband and your marriage.

Comparing your man to his father (or any other important figure in his life) is a surefire way to compromise your relationship.

But it’s not just that, it can also bring up a ton of trauma for him.

In my own marriage, my husband has his fair share of issues with his dad. He hates that he inherited his dad’s temper, and it’s something he works on every day.

So, if I were to throw this line in his face during an argument, it would crush him.

The truth is, our husbands share their vulnerabilities with us.

They open up about their past and trust us with their inner wounds.

Don’t betray that trust just because you want to hit him where it hurts.

Remember, your husband is not his father, and he deserves to be loved and accepted for who he is.

So, instead of comparing him to someone else, focus on the good things about him and work together to overcome any challenges you may face.

7. I’m having an affair

“I’m having an affair” is a statement that can cause a lot of damage to a marriage.

Infidelity can be incredibly painful for both partners.

It can break down trust and lead to feelings of insecurity and resentment.

Even if your husband forgives you for having an affair, it can be challenging to move past it and rebuild your relationship.

If you’re feeling unhappy or unfulfilled in your marriage, it’s essential to address those feelings with your husband before considering an affair.

Cheating is not a solution to your problems, and it can cause a lot of damage that may be impossible to repair.

If you’ve already had an affair and are considering telling your husband, it’s important to approach the situation with empathy and understanding.

Be prepared for your husband to feel hurt, angry, and betrayed.

It may take time for him to process his feelings and decide whether or not he wants to stay in the marriage.

Ultimately, the decision to tell your husband about an affair is a personal one.

However, it’s important to consider the impact it will have on your marriage and your husband before making any decisions.

Remember, honesty is essential in any relationship, but it’s important to approach difficult conversations with care and sensitivity.

You may like: 8 Smart Tips to Make Your Husband Jealous

8. I wish I never married you

This statement can be incredibly hurtful and can be hard to come back from.

When you say something like this to your husband, it can make him feel like he’s not good enough for you, and it can damage his self-esteem and confidence.

It can also make him feel like you don’t value your marriage or the life you’ve built together.

It’s important to remember that marriage is a commitment, and it’s not always going to be easy.

There will be times when you and your husband disagree or have arguments, but that doesn’t mean that you regret getting married.

If you’re feeling frustrated or unhappy in your marriage, it’s important to communicate those feelings with your husband in a constructive way.

Instead of saying hurtful things, try to work together to find solutions to your problems.

Remember, marriage is a partnership, and it takes effort from both partners to make it work.

If you’re struggling, consider seeking the help of a marriage counselor or therapist to work through your issues together.

Ultimately, saying “I wish I never married you” is a statement that can cause a lot of damage to your relationship.

It’s important to approach your marriage with love, respect, and a commitment to work through any problems that arise.

9. I don’t need your help

I know you’re a strong and independent lady that doesn’t need a man’s help, and I support you in that!

But verbally saying it to your husband is not the way to go about things.

Because if we remove gender from the equation, we ALL want to feel needed by our spouse.

I know my husband can fold his own laundry, but I like doing it for him.

He knows I can assemble Ikea furniture quicker than him, but he likes helping me out.

When you tell your husband you don’t need him, you make him feel useless.

And when one person in a marriage doesn’t feel needed, it can make them slowly start to check out.

Even worse, that’s when they might start looking elsewhere, for someone who does need them.

So, instead of telling your husband you don’t need him, try showing him how much you appreciate him and all that he does for you.

Trust me, it’ll make a world of difference in your relationship.

You may like: 11 Signs Your Husband Is Controlling, and How to Handle It

10. Don’t be ridiculous

Something that may not seem like a big deal, but it can actually be really harmful to your marriage.

Saying “You’re being ridiculous” to your husband is not just demeaning, but it can also break down the bond between you both.

When your man is expressing himself or sharing an idea, being told that he’s being ridiculous is almost like saying, “Your feelings, opinions, and wishes don’t matter.”

Not only could this affect his confidence, but he may struggle to open up to you later down the line.

All of this can lead to a downward spiral that could harm your marriage.

So, instead of dismissing his thoughts or feelings, try to understand where he’s coming from. Listen to him and show him that you value his input.

Remember, communication is key in any relationship, and it’s important to treat each other with respect and kindness.

11. You remind me of my Ex

Two statements that you should never say to your husband.

Saying “You’re just like your ex” or “You’re just like MY ex” are both bad ideas.

We’ve already talked about the danger of comparison, but when you bring exes into the equation, it worsens the situation tenfold.

Not only can it imply jealousy on one or both of your parts, but it’s also unfair.

Your husband shouldn’t be judged on his choice of ex-partner.

After all, his taste can’t be too bad because he chose you too!

And comparing him to your ex?

Well, that’s almost a guaranteed way to end up in the divorce lawyer’s office.

No man wants to be compared to his wife’s ex.

It’s the ultimate insult and can be really hurtful to your husband.

So, instead of bringing up past relationships, focus on the present and how you can work together to build a strong and healthy marriage.

Remember, you chose each other for a reason, so celebrate that and appreciate each other for who you are.

Is He “The One”? Take your free compatibility test

12. Our marriage is over

Lastly, let’s talk about the one word that should never be used lightly in a marriage: divorce.

While this might seem obvious, you’d be surprised at how many people throw it around out of anger, frustration, or to hurt or threaten their partner.

But in all the above scenarios, it’s never a good thing to say unless you actually mean it.

So, if you want to stay married, stay well clear of the dreaded D word.

If you’re mad at your husband, explain why. If you want to hurt your husband, explore why you feel this way.

And if you want to threaten your partner, there are clearly some issues that need to be addressed in your marriage.

Perhaps you feel he doesn’t value you or he takes you for granted. It might be worth speaking to a marriage counselor.

The truth is, our words have a long-lasting impact.

I’ve seen married couples bring up things their spouse said years ago – they never forgot.

So, if you want a long-lasting marriage, be cautious with your words, especially when you’re angry.

Remember, communication is key, but it’s important to communicate with kindness and respect.

You may also like:

Do You Bring These 11 Essential Ingredients to Your Relationship? The Secret of Long-lasting Love

Cracking Your Partner’s Love Language: 8 Things Most Couples Ignore (And Steps to Succeed)

Do I Need a Relationship Coach? 10 Reasons You May Need One (And Why You May Not)