When You Get Back With An Ex After Years (3 Things You Should Know)

Still wondering if you can get back together with your ex after breaking up several years ago? 

Many relationships do not work out, but circumstances can change.

Other times, you just age or are confronted with specific life experiences that force you to comprehend mistakes you may have made in the past.

You are left desiring a second chance because you are convinced that your ex is the one or because you are convinced that you can both be extremely happy together.

Rest assured that reconciling with an ex after years apart is most likely still possible! With the appropriate strategy, why shouldn’t you be able to win the heart of someone who once sincerely cared or even loved you?

If you were able to seduce him or her before, you will most likely be able to seduce them again; and we will show you how in this article!

Consider This Before You Get Back With An Ex After Years Apart

So, do you still look back on your ex and your relationship and question if you did the right thing by breaking up with him or her?

We look at what you should think about before reconciling with an ex after years apart. It is critical to be honest with yourself – and with your ex. If you don’t, you risk hurting each other all over again.

1) You broke up for what reasons? Are they still an issue?

It is critical to explore the concerns and issues that led to your breakup in the first place. If you believe they are no longer an issue, getting back with your ex may be a smart decision if you still love him or her.

However, if you don’t believe those concerns have been adequately handled, you should examine how to overcome them before you even consider getting back together.

If you don’t deal with them, they’ll just come back and cause you trouble.

In fact, you may end up hurting one other even more because those issues may be even more painful now, years or months later.

To do so, discuss with your ex about why you broke up in the first place and see whether they have moved on from the issues you had.

It’s possible that he or she is still deeply hurt by what happened between the two of you.

Or they may still refuse to accept responsibility for the wrongs they committed when you were together.

It could be at that point that you realize that even if you get back together, your old troubles will still be bothering you.

Or it could be that you are willing to try again while completing the required work to assist in resolving the issues that are still bothering you.

Without a doubt, the most important takeaway from all of this is that you both need to connect with one another on a much deeper and more often basis than you previously did.

This way, you’ll give yourself a fighting shot of making things work this time.

You may like: The 5 Official Stages of a Breakup (Plus 5 Secrets to Getting Over It Fast)

2) Has Something Changed Since Then?

When we want our ex back, we are frequently unable to recognize whether or not anything has changed.

Even if you still love him or her after years apart, it can be useful to consider what has changed and why it would be different this time.

The reason for this is that just because you desire things to be different does not guarantee that they will be this time. We always want to hope for the best, but it isn’t always enough in relationships.

Someone has had to radically change or admit their wrongdoings, or someone has had to shift their perspective on what has occurred in the past.

This can take a long time, which is why getting back together after years away can be incredibly successful.

Changing your viewpoint on something can actually help with forgiveness and can offer you a real fighting chance of success if you get back with an ex.

It means you can move on from past situations and understand why you both responded the way you did.

3) Are You Truly In Love With Him/Her?

This is an extremely important question to ask yourself, and you must take the time to answer it honestly and freely.

You don’t even have to tell your ex your views or feelings about the solution. However, you must determine whether you still love your ex.

Answering this issue is crucial since much of why we miss an ex is because of habit, not love.

We miss someone because of the pattern we developed with them, and we simply become accustomed to their companionship all of the time, as and when we desire it.

When something is gone, it is the habit that we miss, and we may struggle to fill the hole.

However, that gap is not always filled with love feelings. So consider whether you miss your ex because you truly love them or because you like being in a relationship.

Many ex-partners re-enter a relationship out of dread of being alone, rather than love.

Is it a struggle to convince him to spend time with you?

Understanding males on a much deeper emotional level is the key to finding a solution.

With a few subtle comments you might make to him, you can actually modify the main reason why men react in this way.

Learn how to become his top priority in this free video by Relationship Psychologist James Bauer.

Take the time to consider if you want this relationship because you enjoy being with your ex in particular, or because you simply enjoy being with someone, even if it is someone else.

If this is the case, it is possible that getting your ex back is not the best next step for you at this time.

Another key question to ask:

Is there a rose-colored lens on your view of the past?

The final question you must honestly answer is whether you see your relationship and your ex through rose-colored glasses.

It is so easy to do, and we often look back and feel like our lives were better back then.

However, we all have a tendency to look back and forget all of the awful things that have happened.

It’s a way of dealing with negative experiences and sentiments from the past, and as a result, we often look back on an ex, even if it was years ago, and recall that period far too fondly.

Keeping this in mind, try to remember all of the bad things that happened in your relationship. It will help you determine whether you want to attempt things again with him.

If you still want your ex back, that is fantastic, and you have a strong possibility of establishing another happy relationship.

However, if you go back on years ago and remember all the awful things that happened, and you come to the conclusion that things may not be rosy for you in the future, you must question yourself and your ex whether you can work through those issues today.

Can You Get Back Together With An Ex Years Later?

When we consider getting back together with an ex, it is often in the immediate aftermath of a breakup. However, some of us may reflect on a past relationship and wonder if it is feasible to reconnect with them now.

Here, we look in depth at whether you can get an ex back after years away and what you need to do to make the relationship work this time.

When You Are Both in Love.

You must both acknowledge to yourself and your ex that you still love each other. If you do, you should get back together and make a serious go of it right now.

You may still need to work on your relationship to ensure its success, but if you still have these strong feelings for one other, you already have a solid foundation to get back together.

However, if you don’t love each other, you should reconsider why you want to see your ex again. When you discover the answers and reasons for this, you may discover deep-seated issues that you must work through in order to move on from the relationship as a whole.

Many of us remember prior partners fondly, forgetting all the awful that has happened – and, more significantly, how those bad situations or character flaws have impacted us and our happiness in the past.

Are you, for example, conveniently ignoring your ex-unpleasant partner’s temper? Or are you forgetting your ex’s ever-moving gaze?

Have you forgotten that you used to bicker all day every day, which would eventually escalate into full-fledged arguments?

Some people find all of these things acceptable, while others do not. In any case, love must always be present in a relationship for it to succeed when people have flaws (which we all have). In truth, we should adore the flaws of the individuals with whom we are in a relationship and love them more because of them, not despite them.

If You Have Resolved Your Problems.

When we break up with someone, it is typically because the difficulties that are causing us to be unhappy appear simply too huge to overcome.

With that in mind, what makes you and your ex different now? Have you both worked to tackle the difficulties that led your relationship to fail the first time?

As previously stated, it is possible that when you were separated, you had time to cool off, and the concerns you had may no longer be such major ones for you.

It’s possible that your perspective on things has shifted and you now have a better grasp of what caused the problems in the first place.

That understanding can actually help individuals go on, and the difficulties may not have been resolved, but they are no longer as problematic.

However, it is possible that those concerns remain. If that’s the case, and you still want your ex back, it might be a good idea for you both to have an open and honest chat.

In that session, you should discuss what needs to change in the future for your relationship to last if you were to try again.

If you don’t, you risk giving it another shot and causing each other more misery when the problems arise again.

You may also like: What to Text Your Ex: 7 Secrets to Reconnect & Fatal Mistakes to Avoid (Not to Look Desperate)

If You’ve Both Forgiven Each Other

In addition to resolving the issues that led to your breakup, you must both have forgiven each other in order to have a possibility at reconciliation.

For example, have you forgiven your ex if he or she had an affair with someone else while you were together?

If you haven’t forgiven your spouse for something like this, or anything else that caused you to split up, you should talk to him or her about it before you start dating again.

The reason for this is that if you haven’t forgiven each other for previous mistakes, they may bring problems in the future.

Forgiveness is the essential to resuming a good relationship, and without it, you are unlikely to last.

If the other issues are no longer present.

In general, we’ve talked about concerns and problems that arise from a person’s actions or character.

For example, a person who cheated or did anything else that caused so much anguish and suffering in a relationship that it ended.

However, there are sometimes more practical reasons why people break up, and if you are both considering if it is possible for you to make a go of things after years apart, those practical issues must be tackled as well.

In reality, this is critical because otherwise, a relationship will fail.

For example, did one of you have to move for work, making your relationship long-distance?

Or did one of you wish to have children? Was it something else that caused you to drift apart?

What is different now, if this is the case? Is one of you reconsidering starting a family? Do you presently live close to one another?

Whatever it is, something needs to alter or be resolved in this relationship for you and your ex to have a chance if you start dating again.

Do people ever reconcile after years apart?

Now that we’ve determined whether it’s conceivable for two individuals to rekindle their relationship after a breakup, we’ll check at whether it actually occurs.

The quick answer is that sure, people do remarry after years apart. However, the techniques and trips they have all made to get to that point will be different.

Because no two people are the same, no two relationships will be the same, hence the ways they reignite their romances will all differ in some ways.

It’s crucial to understand this so that if you’re hoping that your ex will want you and him to start dating again, you don’t put all your eggs in one basket.

For example, just because you want to try again does not mean that your ex will, especially if you were the one who broke things off in the first place.

As a result, many individuals around the world will assert that people never get back together after being away for years. Some will wish that this could happen one day and that they could reclaim their ex.

However, many people fail to re-establish themselves since the issues that first drove them apart are still there. As a result, they never get back together to see if things can work out differently – they fail at the first hurdle.

As a result, many individuals would advise you to be extremely cautious before resuming a relationship with an ex. Most likely, those people have tried to do the same thing in the past and have been wounded.

You may like: The Ex Factor Review: Does This “Ex-back” Guide Work? What We Found

Does Getting Back Together With An Ex Ever Work?

Trying to get back together with an ex is rarely easy, but even if you do, will it be worth it? Is it possible to be happy with an ex even years after you split up? Or are you simply condemning yourself to more agony and suffering in the future?

As usual, there is no simple solution. The reason for this is that relationships are so extraordinarily varied every time – not only can they fluctuate from couple to couple, but they can also vary enormously at any one moment or place.

Timing is essential in a relationship and can build or destroy two people’s feelings for each other.

So, if you are able to reestablish your relationship with your ex, it is possible that things will be different this time.

It’s possible that you’re both finally ready to admit that you want to devote your lives to each other and marry, although when you first met, you were much younger and didn’t want to commit to anything.

However, there are times when reconciling with an ex simply does not work. It can be difficult to predict whether this will be you if you don’t try.

However, you should be aware that if the two of you’s relationships break down in the future, your sentiments may be damaged all over again.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is it possible to reconcile with an ex after years apart?
It is possible to reconcile with an ex if you both ensure that you have moved on from the issues that led to the breakup in the first place. Furthermore, you must verify that you both still love each other after all of your time apart has passed.

Do people ever reconcile after years apart?
Many couples reconcile after years of separation. It doesn’t always work out for everyone, but for some couples, it results in a pleasant new relationship where both individuals feel good about being back together.

Does Getting Back Together With An Ex Ever Work?
Getting back together with an ex might be dangerous. It may appear to be a wonderful option for some couples, but in reality, the issues that caused the first breakup resurface. However, for some, the time apart can reveal that they both have feelings that are too strong to give up.

Should You Ever Rekindle Your Relationship With An Ex?
If you want to get back with an ex, make sure you do so with an open mind and without rose-colored glasses. Our brains are typically programmed to recall the good and forget the bad. It means that getting back together with an ex may appear to be a much better option than it is.

What Percentage of Exes Actually Gets Back Together Again?
Putting numbers on ex-couples reconciling is difficult since there are so many variables at play at any given time. Furthermore, just because exes reconcile does not guarantee that you and your ex will be able to stay together if you give your relationship another chance.

The Final Word

It is difficult to restart a relationship that has already failed. To begin, the two persons involved must both want to try again and become a pair. What is more difficult is to re-establish and maintain a relationship.

The reason for this is that all of the grief and hurt that resulted from the first breakup of the relationship is likely to remain. While this may be managed and worked through, it takes a lot of effort and strong communication between two people to do so.